STOP THE SPAM - You're making me crazy

I just walked out to my mailbox (ya know the postal one) and I checked through the nonsolicited mailings that I got. I threw away the ones I wasnt intersted in.

One, however, I kept. It was a coupon for a pizza place. I showed my roomate the coupon and he agreed it was a fair price for something we were interested in purchasing. We then went forward in the pizza purchase, based on nonsolicited mail.

Does this make me stupid? I dont think so. I think a fair amount of us pay at least some attention to the stuff we get in the mail. So why not our email box?

The way I figure it is basically this. The products that are stuffing themselves into my email box every day are simply products I dont want to purchase. I dont do prescription drugs so I dont give a shit that I can get xanax cheaper. My penis is comfortable at 6 inches and I'm glad that its the size it is. It stays erect as long as I need it to, sometimes longer so I dont need help there either. I dont want to visit your website, even if you do have "HOT TEEN GIRLS BRO". I never met you in a chat room and I dont want to see your webcam. I dont want to join a paysite for donkey sex or S&M and even if I did I know how to use google.

So, what am I saying here?

I'm saying that, I wouldnt mind getting email from some people. Ya know, if newegg.com dropped the price on a geforce 5950 by 50 bucks, I'd be all over it. If someone had some pretty impressive RAM deals I'd be interested. If Pepsi sent me a letter telling me about pepsi edge and including a printable coupon for a free one, I'd cash it in. And yes, if Papa Johns let me know I can get a 2 topping pizza for 9.99 in my email I would have bought one.

But these arent the companies sending spam, are they?

The reason for this is that sending email is pretty much close to free. I could sign up with one of a thousand different spam friendly service provicders and start cranking out "YOUR COCK IS TOO TINY" email in a matter of minutes.

Sending spam to my REAL mailbox costs REAL money. Not 200 bucks a month for unlimited mailing... we've got printing costs and delivery costs and the like. Not to mention its fairly competetive... if your deals arent good and your graphics and paper arent quality you look shoddy and it hits the trashcan.

but email? any fuckfac russian spammer can get in your face about how cheap they can get you blackmarket goofy pills that'll turn your cock rockhard and a little blue for the next 6 weeks.

The answer is pretty much a pipe dream, and I'm afraid bill gates came up with it first. It would require a nation wide agreement amongst server providers to offer a limited number of free emails to each subscriber and chargin a fair sum for emails past that point.

Charge these fucks top dollar to send out their pecker pills and i'll bet you dimes to donuts that your mailbox will empty out pretty fast. Then you'll be recieving spam you might actually care to get.

then again a fair number of you dont give a flip about spam either way I guess. That's fine. I dont mind :) Just saying, a cheap pizza is a good pizza.

Posted: Wednesday 14th July 2004, 11:07 PM By Boogie, from the 3rd floor of the dark tower.